It’s not as easy as one might think to write based on observation. I still remember an exercise I did in freshman English in high school. My teacher gave each group an orange and asked us to examine it. We noticed the pebbled texture of the skin, examined the wrinkling around the stem end, pulled away the layers of peel and sticky white membrane, split apart a segment and poked with a pen tip at the packets of juice lined up orderly as rows of corn. It takes practice to see things this way though!
In order to write about a place, you first need to see it, and see the details that create its overall impact or impression. Window boxes with pink geraniums, cobbled streets, hand-carved wooden signs with names like the Yankee Drummer and the Likker Store (an ice cream shop), wrought iron lamposts–these all create a certain impression. To let your reader see the place you’re describing, you need to give him or her those details, not just It was a nice town.
In my f2f classes we practiced by looking at images of the cosmetics store Lush. Here are some images of the store:
One student wrote
The merchandise is very colorful and bright, but the way it is displayed is messy. It looks too cluttered and crowded. They’re stacked on each other way too high, which makes it look unappealing.
Note that someone who hasn’t seen the pictures has by now no idea what he or she is talking about! Start with the big picture: what’s the size and shape of the retail space? what building materials is it made from (floor, walls, ceiling)? what lighting? is there music playing (if so, what?), or other sounds? how about smells? tastes? does it logically divide into sections? What furniture does the room contain? How are products displayed? You need to describe the products (not every one, but a representative sample–in a clothing store, for example, you might describe what’s on the mannequins, if that’s how clothing is displayed). You need here to say that (in places) we see slabs of soap, unwrapped, like fudge almost, piled how high, what colors, and so forth. Look at the signs; note the use of black and white (the size of small, hand-held chalkboards that kids use); how would you describe the font used?; what are some of the names of the soaps?
Sometimes it’s helpful to think about a similar place and how your place is different (in order to better see the distinguishing features of yours). So think about how Lush is different from Bath and Body Works, say. (Or how Price Rite is different from Stop and Stop is different from Whole Foods.) You won’t be writing a comparison/contrast essay–you don’t need to write about that second, similar place, but rather use your image of it to help you see what’s in front of you in your place.
And one other thing I wanted to point out about that student sample. Notice how the writer seems to be inserting her own aesthetic judgment here. It may be difficult to avoid inadvertently making clear how you feel about the place, but generally it’s preferable to try for a more objective description (because one person’s cluttered is another’s cozy, and you’re not sure how your reader would feel about your space). What you are concerned with here, though, is how this space is or is not tailored to a particular type of customer and how it appeals to that customer.